You know, sometimes it's the strangest things that can bring us down. Small things, silly things.
Last Friday, I took the kiddos to see the Smurfs in 3D. Their first 3D movie! Adam was so excited. I was too...I actually don't think that I've ever seen a 3D movie either!
We put on our funny-looking glasses and the movie begins. Sydney is sitting to my left and laughing at the things popping out on the screen. Adam is sitting to my right, looking confused.
"When does the 3D start, mama?"
"You can't see it, love? Those Smurfs popping out of the screen?" No, he says.
He's frustrated and mad. He wants my glasses, thinking his are broken. I immediately flash back to something Adam's eye surgeon said a few years ago. When you don't have a lens in your eye, you are unable to see in 3D.
Shit on a stick.
For those that don't know, Adam was diagnosed with a cataract in his right eye when he was 6 months old. By 9 months, the cataract had started to obstruct his vision, and the cataract and lens of his eye needed to be removed. He has worn a hard contact lens in that eye since he was 9 months old. But he still can't see in 3D because there is no natural lens in his eye.
Sigh. Yet another thing that my sweet kiddo can't experience. And how do I explain that to him? I just told him that what he was seeing was normal, but I could tell he was totally disappointed.
Add that to the fact that I'm sending him off into the wild unknown of Kindergarten, coupled with T1D in a few weeks, and I'm just sad. I want things to be easy for him and they are not. I don't want him to miss class time because of this stupid disease. I don't want him to be the last kid to the lunch table because he's got to go to the nurse first. It's not fair. I don't want a 5-year-old to have to explain that the little machine on his hip keeps him alive to all the other 5-year-olds.
I also just made a follow-up appointment with his craniofacial surgeon (yes, he totally won the genetic lottery - he was born with a cleft lip too) since it has been 2 years since his last appointment and we need to start figuring out what to do with his mouth.
It's a mess in there, people. Orthodontia for this kid is going to cost a small fortune.
So, I'm going to pour another glass of wine tonight and wait for tomorrow.
After all, tomorrow is a new day. And it will be a good one.