Wednesday, August 31, 2011

One Year

Put up your feet my friends, grab a cup of whatever tickles your fancy (I prefer wine, but that is just me). This is a long one!

It has been one whole year since Adam’s diagnosis.

Over 3600 needle pokes to his little fingers.
Over 800 injections.
Approximately 90 site changes.
Lots and lots of Dex changes.

I wasn't sure what this milestone would mean for me/us. Honestly, we haven't talked about it with Adam. Maybe it's because I didn't want to make a big deal out of a sad day. But Denise just reminded me of something that I had never thought of before (really!) We SHOULD celebrate! Because this is the anniversary of the day his life was SAVED. Okay, I cry just writing that, but it is so true. 

We don't have any big plans because this is a ridiculously busy week for our family, but I think we should do something this weekend. We will be up at my parents' cabin with family, and I just realized that we went to the cabin over Labor Day weekend last year after Adam got out of the hospital too. I'm thinking a bonfire and s'mores are in order. 

I never really properly told his “diagnosis” story, so I thought I’d share that today. It’s been on my mind so much lately as I’ve been going through old pictures – automatically classifying things as “before diabetes” and “after diabetes.”

I began getting suspicious that something was really wrong with Adam when we went out to dinner and he drank 4 cups of milk in one sitting. And he was still thirsty. He’d been wetting the bed…and sleeping a ton. I would joke on Facebook about how he’d randomly fall asleep in the strangest places. That summer there were countless pictures of Adam sleeping. It’s sad to think about it now.

That night, I googled. Google can be a mom’s best friend or her worst enemy. That night, it was my worst enemy.

As I searched…I kept hitting on diabetes. I was thinking, “Steph, you are projecting this hypochondriac stuff on your kid. He doesn’t have this.” But I kept looking at diagnosis stories. And somewhere, someone mentioned a “sweetness” to their child’s breath. I went upstairs and smelled his breath as he slept. And damned if it wasn’t sweet. I didn’t want to say anything to my husband, because that would make it real. I still didn’t want to believe it. But I knew.

The next morning, he slept in. I knew I was going to take him to the doctor. I snuck into his room and cuddled in bed with him. I was literally thinking, “This is the last time life will be normal for us. Our life is going to change.” I just KNEW it.

On the way to the pediatrician’s office, I happened to glance down at a few empty water bottles in my car. They were from my local grocery store and happened to have JDRF labels on them. I thought to myself, “This is a sign. I know he has Juvenile Diabetes.”

In the pediatrician’s office, his urine was tested – lots of sugar. The nurse came in to prick his finger. When the number popped up, the nurse wouldn’t look me in the eye. I asked what the number was, and she showed me. It was 550. Tears sprung to my eyes. I didn’t really know what it meant, but I knew it was bad.

Our beloved pediatrician came in, and all she had to say was, “I’m sorry.” She gave me a huge hug and said she just about started crying when she saw his numbers. She’s been with us through the cleft lip, the reflux, the cataract and now this.

When I got into my car, on the way to the hospital, I looked at those JDRF water bottles on the floor again and I thought how incredible it was that so much can change with just one tiny drop of blood.

On my way to the hospital, I called Jason at the airport and stopped him from getting on his flight for work. I called my mom. I called my dearest friend. All while Adam is sitting in the backseat of the car, pretty much bewildered at what is going on. Heck, even I had no clue about how much his life was going to change.

I watched him get his first injection of Levemir and his first injection of Novolog. He was hysterical. And it blew my mind that I was going to have to do this every.single.time he ate anything from now on. For the rest of his life. 

One of my most vivid memories from that fog that was the hospital was when I went down to the hospital pharmacy by myself to pick up Adam’s prescriptions. The pharmacist plunked down two huge bags in front of me – those two bags held the items I would need to keep my son alive for the next month. I started crying as I handed over my credit card and I think the pharmacist was a bit freaked out. I cried as I walked back to Adam’s room and just kept on crying. It was the first time in our 3 days at the hospital that I cried. Once I started, I couldn’t stop.

I look back on all that now…and I still cry when I think about it. But I am also hopeful for how much we have overcome and how in just one short year, we are pumping, CGM-ing and kicking diabetes’ ass when we can. Adam has gone from a hysterical child getting pricked and poked every few hours, to a kid who can explain to an adult how to test his blood sugar and do it correctly right in front of them.

He’s a kid who says, “Eh, it doesn’t hurt that bad.” A kid who doesn’t flinch when I test him in bed or change infusion sets. A kid who asks “How many carbs are in that?” before eating something. He’s truly my hero.
Thinking back over the last 5 years – his cleft lip, his ridiculous reflux that required 2 medicines to control, his cataract, THE ‘BETES –  I realize that we are living in this place called Life Is Hard.  No one gets a free pass, everyone has their very own special challenges in life. But it’s a beautiful life, an amazing life, and it is Good.

There are so many lessons to be learned. I know that Adam was brought into my life to teach me that life is not perfect…yet it is perfect all the same.

When I was pregnant with him, and found out he was to be born with a cleft lip and perhaps palate, the world seemed to stop turning. I wanted to go back, start over in my perfect pregnancy with my perfect little family with no issues. I was afraid I wouldn’t love him when he was born because he looked different. I was afraid the joy of birth would be taken away because he wasn’t technically “perfect.”

And oh, how wrong I was. Falling in love with that sweet boy’s face with the little notch taken out of his lip. He was sweet, he was mine and he was perfect.

It was my first lesson in giving up on “what I think life should be” and what life just is. Accepting it. Celebrating it. Living it.

I won’t ever give up hoping for a cure for Adam. But I will help him live is life as if diabetes is just an afterthought, something that hangs in the background while he does all of the things he wants to do. I will make it easy for him. I will bear the burden. Because that is what us D-moms do.


Saturday, August 27, 2011

Weekends are nice

I admit it.

I'm missing my kids now that they are in school all day long.

I wandered into Target the other day (okay, let's face it, I wander into Target MANY times during the week) and saw moms with their little ones, shopping and sharing popcorn. Just like we used to do during the day. I miss that. I miss that that stage of life has suddenly passed me by. Where did these last 8 years go, anyway?

We have a lot of friends our age that are just starting out with their families. They are knee-deep in diapers, toddlers, tantrums and the Wiggles (** thing I DON'T miss is the Wiggles**) It's gotten to the point where my hubby has a tiny bit of baby fever.

But then we are quickly snapped back to reality with our own uber-busy life.

And let's face it...I'm just not willing to go belly-up to the craps table, roll the dice and see what genetic cocktail Lady Luck has for us this time.

The upside to all of this is that I am really enjoying the time I have with my kids when they are not in school. Today I built Lego castles with Adam in the morning and then went shopping and to the library with Sydney. We found a cozy spot and she read about hamsters (did I mention we have a new pet??)  and I started a new book.

Life has a nice balance to it right now. Aside from diabetes, of course - which always seems to throw a wrench into my well-laid plans. Like on Friday, when I was in the middle of my Biology lab, I got a call from the nurse telling me that Adam's infusion set fell out. I just looked around my classroom and thought, "REALLY?? Really?" So I left class, zipped over to Adam's school and inserted a new infusion set and ran back to class and didn't miss but 5 minutes of lecture.

Just call me MacGyver.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Adam Takes Charge!

Let me tell you - it was much harder than I thought to find the perfect book to read to Adam's class! Some were too long, some were for older kids, some were about kids on MDI. 

After purchasing nearly every book on Amazon related to diabetes at school...I finally found a winner:

 It was perfect! Simple, easy to understand wording for 5-year-olds - CHECK! Story revolves around a child on a pump - CHECK! I excitedly showed it to Adam and his face promptly fell and he said, "Hells NO! That book is about a GIRL!" 

Okay, so he didn't say "Hells NO." But it was the 5-year-old equivalent. Complete with eye-rolling. 

But, I had found the perfect book! I was not going to give up that easily. And I knew that I was far too lazy to reinvent the wheel and create a book all about Adam like the amazing Reyna did.

So I came up with the next best thing: Lara Adam Takes Charge!

We had to eliminate all traces of that sweet, little girl. So, I got out my glue stick and went to work:


I went to Adam's class this morning and read the book. They really enjoyed it! And they liked all of the pictures of Adam, so it was win-win for everyone. They asked some good questions too - like, "Does he have to wear it all the time?" "Does diabetes ever go away?" And the most important question...."Does it HURT??" Adam answered honestly and said, "Sometimes it does, and sometimes it doesn't."

 Adam really enjoyed his "rock star" status this morning. He was answering questions, pulling out his pump and telling everyone "Hey, wanna push some buttons??" LOL! To which I quickly said NO! It was a good little discussion. Some kids had heard of diabetes, some had a grandparent with Type 2.

I also wanted to share our "communication" sheet** that I borrowed from Reyna and added our own things to it - for example, Adam's eye drops, which he gets at lunch time. I LOVE this log sheet - I'm able to see what goes on during the day and make tweaks if necessary.

The nurses like it too! I feel totally informed of what goes on during the day, and they often call me  (like today, when he was getting a BG check before a class birthday treat and discovered that he was 54!) We are still changing things up a bit - we've noticed that he goes REALLY low after PE, even if he's on the higher side to begin with. Like today, he was 189 before PE, so I figured he'd be fine. Well, an hour later he was that lovely 54, so we have some things to think about. They must really run them hard in PE, because when Adam plays outside, he doesn't drop that fast usually. Ah, diabetes. Must you be so persnickety?

**And, YES, I totally posted this communication sheet because his numbers were totally awesome that day. Full disclosure! 'Cause today, they weren't that great. :)

Friday, August 19, 2011

Adam's Personal Snack Bar


Well, my child has already figured out how to beat the system. Whenever he is hungry (which is all the freakin' time) he decides that he MUST be he heads off to the health office only to find out that he's perfectly fine (or a bit high). And he just HAS to have a cheese stick.

Of course, we all know that hunger is a symptom of low blood sugar as well as high blood sugar. But where do I draw the line? He's already a 'frequent flier' in the health office due to the diabetes, but now he's there more often than he needs to be. Now, for the record, the nurse and her assistant have no problem with this...but I do. He is going to start missing a lot of class time. Is this just a maturity issue? He still cannot distinguish between highs and lows...and I certainly don't want to tell him NOT to go to the nurse.

But it's getting kind of ridiculous now that I've already had to refill his "cheese & snack" drawer a week and a half into school. My little grazer has figured out that not only is the health office a place to test his blood sugar, but also free snack time as well.


Wednesday, August 17, 2011


I've kept my child-friendly "diabetes" books on a shelf up until now.

The beginning of school has been crazy-busy, and Adam has had such a positive experience at school and I honestly thought that I might not need to explain diabetes to a kindergarten class. After all, I hadn't observed any kids asking Adam about his insulin pump, or his Dexcom. For some silly reason, I just thought no one noticed.

Today, while we are driving to Adam's eye doctor appointment, he says to me, "Mom...I have to tell you something. Kids at school keep saying 'Adam is sick....Adam is sick' and I am NOT SICK!" I know this is because he visits the health office so much, and really, the kids have no clue what is going on. All they know is that he leaves the classroom a lot. But he feels like he is being teased.

I asked him what he told them, and he said, "I just told them that I have diabetes." He is also saying the kids are asking about his Dexcom transmitter on his arm too.

I asked him if it bothered him and he said yes. He is always such an easygoing kid, that I often forget that things do upset him.

So, I'll be talking to his teacher about setting up a time to come in and talk a bit about diabetes on a kindergarten level, and read our books. Hopefully this will stop some of the teasing and questioning.

Now I've got to figure out how to explain this in 5 year old terms! I think I'm gonna go peek at Reyna's book she made for Joe. :)

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Routine is Good.

First off...this SAHM gig? I had all of these grand illusions that once both of my kids were in school, I'd have scads of time to get things done around the house.

Really? Ha! The joke's on me. In fact, I feel like I'm BUSIER now than ever before. And I haven't even started school for myself yet. Yikes! I am running every day - school, gym, shower, school, oil changed, bank, store and school again. It's nuts.

But, I do have to say that routine has been GREAT for Adam and his blood sugars. (I'm expecting a bolt of lighting from the diabetes gods to strike me down anytime now that I declared that.)

He is not "grazing" all day long, as was his habit before, so I am getting a much better picture of whether or not his carb ratios and basals are on target. And, by golly, I think they are for the most part. Here's his school schedule:

6:15 am - wake up, get fasting BG

6:30 am - eat breakfast

7:15 am - walk to school, school begins at 7:45 am (I KNOW!!)

9:00 am - first BG check of the day, get insulin for snack (we've decided on bolusing him for 1/2 of his snack carbs, since he has recess immediately after. This is working well for us.)

10:50 am - BG check before lunch

11:20 - back to nurse for insulin for lunch

1:00 pm - final BG check of the day (unless there is PE or he is not feeling well)

2:15 pm - pick up from school 

School is going well, and we are still making some tweaks to his lunch routine, but overall, things are going GREAT. I have lots of communication with the nurse - for example, today he felt really hungry at 12:45, so he went to the nurse and he was high - in the 240's. So she gave him some water and a cheese stick and we decided to test him again at 1:30 since he still had insulin in his system from lunch. And sure enough, at 1:30 he was down in the 160's. I am so thankful for the communication. And you know, go figure, because yesterday at his 12:45 check he was only 80. And he had the SAME LUNCH!  Ah, diabetes. You love to keep us guessing.

My goal for the rest of the week is to "wean" myself from school a bit. I think Adam thinks that I will be at lunch every day, and that is not the case. But I am so proud of him and how he has learned so many new things in the last week. And he is being so responsible with his diabetes care - I love the fact that he will make it known when he feels like he needs to be tested. That was one of my biggest worries - that he'd sit quietly and be afraid to tell someone he doesn't feel right. 

So that is my update! We are quickly approaching Adam's one-year diabetes diagnosis, and I have lots of feelings surrounding that. However, when I think back to our diagnosis and I compare it to now - I can't believe how far we've come and how blessed we have been. Diabetes sucks, but life is good.

Friday, August 12, 2011

Adam's First Week of School!

Well, ladies (and gentlemen?) I have to declare our first week at school as a success. It was a busy week, and I sure as heck didn't get any of that "down time" that I imagine other mothers get when their last child goes to school all day, but overall, the week went very well. (Okay, all 3 days of it.)

I have to give major props to the staff at our school. LOVE THEM. Adam's nurse and health assistant are phenomenal. They had a 6th grader with T1D last year, and they could have said, "oh, this is no big deal, we've got it covered." But T1D in a 5 year old is very different than in a 12 year old. And they knew that! Our health assistant is on her own 2 days a week while the nurse is at a different school, and she told me that she even had a nightmare already about giving Adam too much insulin through his pump. I felt so bad that she was having "diabetes dreams" like I do, but in a strange way I was happy, because it meant that she GOT IT. That diabetes is a big deal...and insulin is a touchy beast.

One thing that I would highly recommend to all moms of little T1D kiddos going to school is to put together an "All about me" letter. I gleaned information from Hallie and Reyna and came up with a flier that has Adam's picture on it and it starts out by saying:

"Hello! My name is Adam **** and that’s my photo. I am a student in Mrs. Goodman’s class, and I have Type 1 diabetes.  My body cannot make insulin, so I wear an insulin pump at all times. It is usually in a belt around my waist, or clipped to my waistband"
It goes on in bullet format, talking about the signs of a low, the signs of high blood sugar, the fact that he needs access to water and the bathroom whenever he wants, and most importantly, to BELIEVE him when he says he doesn't feel well and send him to the nurse. 
I handed these out to the nurse and his teacher, and they were very excited about it and asked if I could print more so they could pass them out to all of the staff that would come in contact with Adam - ie: playground aides, cafeteria aides, music teacher, etc. and I said sure! They handed them out in their meeting on the first day of school, and ever since then, I've had aides come up to me to say, "You are Adam's mom? We got his flier!" It was a GREAT way to build relationships with people I didn't know before and to make them aware of Adam's special needs.

I also made up "low kits" for Adam's music teacher and P.E. teacher - got the great idea from Donna to put them in clear pencil pouches so they are easy to carry. They have juice boxes, glucose tabs/gel and the above flier, outlining the signs of a low. They appreciated having these as well!

I think it helps that I do have a good relationship with the school already, since my 3rd grader has been attending for 4 years. But she has never been to the nurse (I know!) in her previous years, so I didn't have a relationship with the health staff. I also chose a different kindergarten teacher for Adam than Sydney had, so she was new to me as well. 

I was reading this post over at D-Mom today, and it really hit home. Building a relationship with your child's school is immensely important. On some level, I knew that already, but after only 3 days, I am seeing how important it is. They are willing to be so flexible with us, and I think it's because I didn't go in there with guns blazing, saying, "This is how it's gonna be." My favorite line from that post is, 

"It’s about being able to ask a favor without it feeling like a favor." Very true.

My goal in all of this is to make diabetes management as easy as possible for them, so that in turn, they will not look at Adam as a "burden." And I know that our health team would not think that, but let's face it, diabetes is a fricken' PITA most of the time. We live it day-to-day, and now so are they, especially with little ones.

Adam has had a fantastic experience at school. The health office is directly across from his classroom, so he has no trouble finding it for blood sugar checks (he goes with another person if he's feeling low) and both his teacher and the nurses have already said that he's been a joy to be around (::proud mommy moment!::) 

He told me that his music teacher came up to him and said that she has diabetes too (Type 2) and he was excited about that (, know, not excited that she HAS diabetes...) I am thrilled that everyone is so open with him, and open to learning more about Type 1. I emailed his teacher a great Power Point that my mom found off of the American Diabetes Association website - it is a great, simple, short presentation about diabetes - and it really gets the point across regarding the difference between Type 1 and Type 2. She was very receptive to it, since she wasn't familiar with Type 1. 

There are so many tools out there to help your child at school. But the best tool of all was my wonderful friends of the DOC. You guys helped me SO MUCH. The nurse was impressed with all of the information I had ready for them, and there is NO WAY I would have been able to do it without y'all. Seriously. 

(((Group Hug!!)))

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

My Babies are Big.

Just for quick reference, here are my kiddos when Sydney was 5 and starting Kindergarten. Adam was just 2 1/2! Look at those little cheekies! I want to pinch them.

And here they are BIG kids. A 3rd grader and a Kindergartener:

My GOoOfY big kids.

Today was a good day. Everyone came home happy, and that is all that matters. I did, in fact, spend the majority of the day at school, but it was fine by me. I am so, so, so blessed that I am able to be home so that I can volunteer at school and be there when they need me.

We have a lot of things to iron out - for instance, figuring out how much to bolus him for his snack, since he'll be going out to recess after. His Dexcom did alarm "below 60" today, so Adam promptly told his teacher and he was escorted to the nurse and his finger stick checked in at 100. So...therein lies the problem with Dex - will it cause more or less stress for everyone? The jury is still out on that one.

I had them under-dose his lunch (scared, I guess) but in retrospect, that was the wrong move, because he stayed in the 200's for the rest of the day. Live and learn, I guess.

Adam did great. Only a few tears at lunch...he was a bit overwhelmed at the big lunchroom, all the kids and noise. He was also chosen as the "special helper" today, so he was very, very proud! I ended up staying to help his teacher for an hour or so - the poor thing has 29 kids with NO aide! I am very thankful that after only 1 day, we already have  great relationship.

Also, I talked with several aides today and they all said, "Oh, you're the one with the diabetic child!" They had a meeting about him today and passed out my "Hello, my Name is Adam..." fliers with his picture on it. I feel pretty confident that in time, everyone will be aware of what Adam's needs are. I'm also thrilled that they are so open with letting me be on campus as much as I want to - and hey, free labor, right?

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

'Twas the Night Before Kindergarten...

...and all through the house, the kidlets were sleeping...

yeah, I got nothin' that rhymes with that. Oh well. :)

I fully admit to a breakdown this afternoon, crying to my mommy. It's all good, just overwhelming. We met with the nurse, teacher and health assistant today and while I am fully confident that things will be okay, it just really hit me how much I have to teach them. Our school nurse has never dealt with a pump before (the T1D kid last year was in 6th grade and did all of her own care with her Omnipod and texted her mom with the info) and the other T1D kid at our nurse's other school is on MDI. So there was a bit of a "deer in headlights" look to everyone when I was explaining how his pump worked. Much like I felt when we first started this whole thing.

They are relying on me and I am relying on them. The school is awesome and they will do whatever I ask, and I can be at school as much as needed...which will be a lot over the next few weeks as we get his schedule situated.

The thing that just broke my heart into tiny little pieces today was when I was explaining the how the Glucagon worked to his teacher. I thought Adam was busy on my iPod, but he was listening. I said something like, "In the event he passes out, this is what you will need to use..." and Adam jumped up and pulled on my arm and made me go back to the bathroom with him. I thought he had to go, but he said, " really scared me when you said 'pass out.' Is that going to happen, Mommy?"

Of all the things he knows about diabetes, I don't think he fully understands what the consequences of a severe low blood sugar are...and really, at 5 years old, he shouldn't have to. But that frightened him. It was the first time I've ever really seen him scared about diabetes (aside from the beginning and all of the shots.)

I reassured him as best as I could, but he was a grumpity grump after that...his blood sugar was really high and everyone got to see what "combative, angry, cranky" high blood sugar looks like. I especially loved the part where he hit me in front of his teacher because we couldn't leave yet. Ugh.

I haven't been terribly sad about diabetes in a long time, but tonight I am. Very sad. And I want to be happy and excited for my boy's big day tomorrow.

Monday, August 8, 2011

I am eating cake. Lots and lots of cake.

This is what we do when we are stressed, isn't it? Eat. Lots. Of. Cake.

Fortunately for me, today is Sydney's 8th birthday and I have lots of cake on hand! Let me push away the stress for a moment and share a pic of my girl. Today is her "Golden Birthday," turning 8 years old on the 8th day of the month (and just for good measure, it's the 8th month of the year!)

She had a fun pool party yesterday with her bestest friends. It was a good day.

Okay, back to me. I'm still eating cake, by the way. Balancing it on my laptop while I type. I'm super-talented like that.

I had another diabetes dream last night. This one was slightly humorous. We are down to our last 2 infusion sets (dude, you don't even have to tell me how stupid I am, and I got on that Animas Smart Ship thing right quick today, after I called to have them expedite our stuff.) So, knowing we were low on infusion sets, in my dream the UPS guy backs up his truck and dumps box after box after box of syringes on my driveway. I started crying and said to the UPS man (like he had any say in the matter) "No!!!! We need INFUSION SETS! Not SYRINGES!! What am I going to do with all of these??" He shrugged his shoulders and took off and left me standing amongst piles and piles of syringes.

So here's what I'm wigging out about now. I have this habit of not liking to be a burden on people...and I have a feeling that this is going to carry over into Adam's school situation. There are some things that I feel like *may* be issues, ie: they've cut down on classroom aides for kindergarten and I'm wondering who is going to be responsible for Adam getting to/from lunch, back to the nurse and then out to the playground. Should I be okay with him doing this himself, or should someone be helping him? Let's face it, I'm going to be there the first week or two, since I just volunteered myself to be lunch mom/helper....but that can't last forever. Because really, have you ever smelled an elementary school cafeteria? GROOOSSSSS.

Let it be said that I haven't met with the nurse yet (that's tomorrow) so maybe all of these questions will be answered. But I am afraid I'm going to be an obnoxious mom, busting in there with all of my pages of notes for people and not knowing how far I'm "allowed" to push for what I want. And quite frankly...this is all new to me, so I don't KNOW what I want. I hate being a burden. I hate is so not in my nature. And now having to rely on others to do my "job" of mama pancreas is scary/hard for me.

I just wish that right now I was bursting full of excitement (like Adam is....and as he should be!) and ready for him to take on this new challenge...and then feel the sweet freedom of having both of my kids in school, without a care in the world. But I don't. I want to be excited for him, but I'm too worried. I wish things were different.

All of that "unknown" stuff is scary.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Fresh Coat of Paint

No, I didn't get my nails done this morning. They still look the same.

But I did take a cue from Reyna and freshened things up a bit around here! I made my first header for the blog this morning...took a few tries, but I'm starting to like it! Makes the blog seem more "mine" rather than a random template.

Meanwhile, I had my first "diabetes at school" nightmare last night.

You know how you have those dreams where you show up to take a final, but realize you haven't been to class all semester and never studied? It was kinda like that.

I dreamed that I took Adam for his first day of school and I hadn't met with ANYONE yet and they wouldn't let me stay. I kept saying, "But no one knows how to take care of him!"

It was awful. But I know that's not going to happen and it will all be fine. I'm kind of ready to get this all over with, because the anticipation is killing me! School starts in 1 week and I am ready...

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

It's always something new.

So THAT'S why his blood sugar has been so high all day. The ol' "blood in the cannula" trick.

Ha, ha, diabetes. You got me. Soooooo very funny.

P.S.....Thank you, DOC, for lifting me up yesterday. Big, virtual hugs to you all.
P.P.S.....Someone needs a manicure. I'm not naming names or anything. We'll just add that to my "To Do" list...

Monday, August 1, 2011

Feeling a little droopy.

You know, sometimes it's the strangest things that can bring us down. Small things, silly things.

Last Friday, I took the kiddos to see the Smurfs in 3D. Their first 3D movie! Adam was so excited. I was too...I actually don't think that I've ever seen a 3D movie either!

We put on our funny-looking glasses and the movie begins. Sydney is sitting to my left and laughing at the things popping out on the screen. Adam is sitting to my right, looking confused.

"When does the 3D start, mama?"

"You can't see it, love? Those Smurfs popping out of the screen?" No, he says.

He's frustrated and mad. He wants my glasses, thinking his are broken. I immediately flash back to something Adam's eye surgeon said a few years ago. When you don't have a lens in your eye, you are unable to see in 3D.

Shit on a stick.

For those that don't know, Adam was diagnosed with a cataract in his right eye when he was 6 months old. By 9 months, the cataract had started to obstruct his vision, and the cataract and lens of his eye needed to be removed. He has worn a hard contact lens in that eye since he was 9 months old. But he still can't see in 3D because there is no natural lens in his eye.

Sigh. Yet another thing that my sweet kiddo can't experience. And how do I explain that to him? I just told him that what he was seeing was normal, but I could tell he was totally disappointed.

Add that to the fact that I'm sending him off into the wild unknown of Kindergarten, coupled with T1D in a few weeks, and I'm just sad. I want things to be easy for him and they are not. I don't want him to miss class time because of this stupid disease. I don't want him to be the last kid to the lunch table because he's got to go to the nurse first. It's not fair. I don't want a 5-year-old to have to explain that the little machine on his hip keeps him alive to all the other 5-year-olds.

I also just made a follow-up appointment with his craniofacial surgeon (yes, he totally won the genetic lottery - he was born with a cleft lip too) since it has been 2 years since his last appointment and we need to start figuring out what to do with his mouth.

It's a mess in there, people. Orthodontia for this kid is going to cost a small fortune.

So, I'm going to pour another glass of wine tonight and wait for tomorrow.

After all, tomorrow is a new day. And it will be a good one.


Happy Monday, everyone! And Happy August....aaacck!! School starts for us in 10 days!!

We had an, um...interesting weekend. Let's just say there was a wild and crazy night where I got to stay up until 2am and there was lots puking involved.

No, no, no...this mama didn't get to go out partying. There was a lovely 24-hour flu bug that visited our house. It hit my 7 (almost 8!) year old the hardest, poor thing. Adam seems to have escaped the wrath, but that may have been because I panicked and gave him a Zofran the instant he started saying he felt like he was going to throw up.

Okay, back to the news you are here to see - the winners of my very first giveaway! I entered y'all in that fancy-dancy sequence-generator-thingie and here are my FIVE winners:

Drum roll, please....

Our first winner is....

Misty! And lucky me, I have a new blog to read... God is Good!

Winner number two is...

Amy! Another new-to-me D-mama. Sheesh, where have I been? Here's her blog, The Sugar Sharks!

Winner number three is...

One of the most awesome D-mamas evah...Laura from Houston...we have a Problem!

Winner number four is...

Denise!! My fellow nursing-student mama and author of the blog My Sweetest Boy 

And our final winner is...

Diane from Our Type 1 Trip! Woo hoo!!

Congratulations, ladies!! Please shoot me an email within 48 hours to and leave me your mailing info so that Coco can come to your home! It has been a bedtime staple here the last few days. :)