Sunday, April 14, 2013

Today I HATE diabetes.

I haven't written in months, mostly because at this point diabetes takes a back seat in our lives. Sure, it's always there, but mostly in the background.

Yesterday my sweet boy turned 7 years old. Today was his big party that he invited his whole class to - a fun Star Wars party at the park, complete with a bounce house. And light sabers made out of pool noodles (courtesy of Pinterest!)

Today also included Glucagon.

Right before Adam's party started, we tested his BG and it was 33. The lowest we have seen in years. And all he can think of is jumping in his bounce house with his friends who are arriving to his party.

We suspend insulin (I seriously just had thoughts of ripping his pod off of him) and tried to force some juice and soda down his throat. He wanted none of it, of course. It was his party! I made him sit for a few minutes until I couldn't keep him down any longer and then let him run around a bit. We rechecked and he was 65. Still not good enough to bounce in the bounce house - I convinced him to eat the frosting off of one of his cupcakes and then I let him go in.

Against my better judgement, sure, BUT IT IS HIS BIRTHDAY PARTY, DAMMIT!

I pull him out again, and he's pissed. I don't blame him one bit. He's getting super angry and refuses to eat or drink anything else. And then he starts crying and asks me if he's going to throw up. When he's super low, he gets that feeling and I could tell he was scared. I know that feeling that way is a precursor to passing out. I tested again and he was only 45.

The only thing I could think to do was a mini-glucagon dose. I wanted to save his party....and I wanted him to have a good time. He was hysterical at the thought of getting a shot, but I took him away from the party, mixed up the gluc, and gave him 7 units (one unit per year of age). He was so sad. I was so sad that I had to do that to him at his own birthday party.

I sat with him until he felt better and then he ran off with his friends. He still didn't feel good. He didn't feel good enough to eat a birthday cupcake. He didn't feel good enough to have everyone sing. After 30 minutes or so, he was back to having fun with his friends.

But I was mad. I still am mad and pissed at diabetes for robbing my son of having a great birthday. It is not fair that he can't have a bounce house at his party and not have to worry about going low. Now that I think about it....what was I thinking getting a bouncy for him?? Ugh. I feel terrible.


  1. Oh man. That sucks. I'm sorry, Stephanie. It's so unfair that either of you had to go through that.

  2. I am so sorry Stephanie! Tears are falling for you and Adam and sending prayers and good thoughts for a good night tonight! Give yourself as well as Adam a hug and know you are an AWESOME pancreas and and even better MAMA! I agree with Scott above, completely unfair for you to go through that, especially at Adam's party. xoxo Tami Wilke

  3. I'm so sorry Stephanie. Its not fair....simple as that. It sucks! But you are amazing! And you got him through his special day! Hang in by day. Praying for you and that tomorrow bring a brighter and better day. ((((Hugs))))

  4. I'm so sorry Stephanie. Its not fair....simple as that. It sucks! But you are amazing! And you got him through his special day! Hang in by day. Praying for you and that tomorrow bring a brighter and better day. ((((Hugs))))

  5. Oh, Steph. I'm so very sorry for that. I know Adam is always such a trooper about things and for that to happen on his party just sucks. I am glad that diabetes does take a backseat most of the time now, but it doesn't seem fair for it to rear it's unpleasant head on a little boy's birthday party. Boo hiss. I hope tomorrow is a better day and that he had fun despite the diabetes. ((((hugs))))

  6. I feel bad you had to give a Glucagon shot; feel bad that sometimes kids get combative when low and won't eat. It's a shame there was nothing you could tempt him with or that he could hold down. But you did what you had to do and I guess it worked. Later on, he may or may not remember that he had to get a shot on his birthday but he will always remember the fun he had in that jumpy house. You did the right thing. Even the glucose spray only has 15 grams, which won't last long; real Coke or real soda is very carby and carbonated; maybe keep some of that and gingerale on hand to see if he can use that next emergency. My mom used to give us gingerale or 7-Up when we felt sick to our stomachs.

  7. It isn't fair. My daughter has told me that many times in the just 37 days since dx. And I feel guilt about the choices I make. You got the bouncy house because he would love it. You want to bring him joy! I told my daughter to pay attention on the swing today, because it makes her go low to swing. I wanted to jump up and suck the words back out of the air as soon as I'd said them, because I just want her to have joy. Here is my blog post about another source of guilt, other parents of T1Ds who've been living with this longer than I have:

  8. Sorry to hear about Adam's birthday. Hopefully, he will only remember the good parts.

  9. What a bday - poor guy. Bouncy houses drop BGs like nothing, don't they? Hope he remembers the fun over the mini-glucagon! Quite the birthday. I hate getting to the point of using it, but I'm always thankful it's an option.

  10. I am catching up on blogs, especially my favorite like yours. I have not blogged in forever either and finally did today. I am so sorry you had to break out the glucagon at all, but especially on his birthday. It's exactly what we post in our videos about doesn't even take a break for birthdays or holidays. It's not fair to our little ones. Natalie LOVES bounce houses and would have been a bouncing fool at Adam's party! They are so alike! Natalie had her lowest (30 something) on my birthday in May and it was awful....she was sweating and kept telling me "I will try to not go to sleep." Thank goodness I didn't have to break out the glucagon. Hugs to you! Miss hearing from you friend!

  11. Felt bad about the Adam's party and about the precious day he was excited about.I hope he is completely fine now and enjoying the life.
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