Monday, February 28, 2011

I must be PMS-ing

It’s funny how one comment can set you off.

And this is not even necessarily a diabetes comment…but of course for me, that’s what it all boils down to these days. The fact that certain people don’t understand our life now and they never will.

I made a comment on Facebook about being excited about taking our kids on a surprise spring break trip to Disneyland (for the first time we are staying on property at the Grand Californian) and taking our daughter to the American Girl store in L.A.

A ‘friend’ commented, “Gee, things must be good in the Drew household, because I could never afford to stay there!”

You know what? Let me tell you what goes on in the Drew household. We don’t sleep through the night.  I am up ranting on my blog at 11pm on a school night because I made basal changes and have to check him again before I can 'safely' go to bed. We stick needles in our son 10 times a day and purposely make him bleed. We insert a catheter into his belly so he can get the life-saving insulin he needs. And sometimes I do it wrong. And his blood sugar goes to over 600, which could have led me sending my son to the ER in DKA because I DID IT WRONG. 

Do you live with that in your house? Do you live with that kind of guilt and pressure to keep your kid alive? No, you are more worried about the stresses of the PTA and what you have to endure as room mom. Me? I can’t be room mom because Adam needs me to be his pancreas. So that means my daughter gets slighted. She gets slighted when she needs/wants/deserves attention but I have to tend to Adam’s needs first.

So you know what? We deserve that vacation. It’s none of your freaking business how we are paying for it.  And to make a snarky comment like that just pisses me off.  Some days I’m glad that I haven’t shared this blog with most of my day-to-day friends – just a chosen few read it…a trusted few. But sometimes I wish I could let everyone read this so they would GET IT.

I suppose I may regret publishing this rant later, but for now I’m posting it. I totally get that everyone has their own issues in life, and perhaps this friend has things going on in her life that I don’t know about. But this isn’t the first time she’s been insensitive and I just had to get it off my chest.


  1. You guys deserve the trip!! No doubt about that. Wish we could join you!! I'm trying to find a vacation for us to get away...too bad D has to come with us.
    I also struggle with who reads my blog. I want to be real but I may hold back and not write something in case a family/friend reads it...kinda defies the purpose.

  2. Thanks, Denise. :) It's so funny, because we NEVER splurge on a trip like this - we usually stay at a decent motel or a hotel using my husbands points from work. But this time he said "screw it - we're going to go all out!" We all need a break, even if diabetes will follow us.

  3. Stephanie, it is reasons like this that I started Beta Buddies. Funny thing is that I wanted people in my "everyday" life to GET IT. I ended up making a ton of friends in the DOC AND many of my IRL day-to-day friends read it as well. It has helped somewhat and sometimes it creates some "local controversy" when I went I talked about a PTO bake sale at open house night - LOL.

    Congrats on the trip. A family fun break is much needed I would say. xoxo

  4. One word... defriend. Is that a word? :) Hugs. You guys deserve such a fabulous trip.

  5. You do totally deserve it!! I am so excited for you!! We were at Disneyland 2 weeks before our diagnosis. I look back at the pictures and it kind of makes me sad on one hand. Sad that looking back at the pictures, you could tell he was sick and we just didn't really know. But on the other hand, I am so thankful that God gave us that time before to just go and have an awesome time. That is soooo what you deserve! It will be the best and Grand Californian will be perfect. And I only wish Emma would have been into American Girl when we went this summer. She got really into it when we went to Dallas in the fall and now she is obsessed. In fact, our Spring Break is revolving around a trip to one. :) I can't wait to see tons of pictures!! And feel free to rant all you want. We have been there and it always helps to know that others have the same things going on. Praying you have the BEST time ever!! I could go on forever about Disney!! It is just the best! Here's the link to our Disneyland pics (just to get you in the mood! Ha!!)

  6. There is always going to be ignorance. That is part of the reason I don't share my blog with people either. I already filter myself enough.

  7. Oh for crying out loud! I think most people have to save up to go to Disney but, guess what, the parks are full so plenty of people can afford to go. Diabetes is very expensive, so I know you had to sacrifice more in order to go. A lot of people do not know how to budget or save; a lot of people sacrifice and are extreme savers; then there are most of us who budget and save for vacations. Rather than complain you cannot afford Disney, better to get a part time job and save for it (and that person probably could, not having a child with D which also cuts into most families work capabilities). You go, girl, and enjoy every moment. You have earned it. And your children will remember this vacation for years to come. Disney really is magical for young children. ENJOY! I know you will have a blast.

  8. I am so glad you have a "safe place" to get it off your chest! And I am so glad that you guys are going to have a FABULOUS vacation... because you DO deserve it. Sounds me me like this friend is just jealous... and perhabs a bit self-centered?

    Like Lora said, there will always people who just don't get it. But there will always be us, too... here to listen and empathize and COMPLETELY understand.


  9. I saw that comment and was surprised that someone would actually say that. They are probably just jealous and needing a vacation too.

    Go and enjoy yourselves! You totally deserve it!

  10. Facebook is a MINEFIELD! At least for me, I have had so many hurtful experiences. I have been insulted and felt angry. One thing that always bothered me was when people would post about how bad things were in their household because someone was sick. It made me think they didn't know how good they had it. But that person who commented on your blog is probably jealous of you in some way and maybe having financial troubles or some other trouble and feels bitter.
    Have a wonderful time on your trip. Live it up!!!! And take lots of pictures to post on faceook. Hee hee.

  11. I saw that comment yesterday and it rubbed me the wrong way, too. She obviously does NOT get it! She wasn't thinking about D at all. She has no idea how challenging and stressful this life is and how desperately we need to escape it from time to time or how we need a dose of wonderful every now and then.

    And who is she to pass judgment like that???

    When we got a puppy last summer, we were all super excited. I posted about it on FB, and a friend commented, "that's all you need," as if three kids and diabetes were too much already.

    Some people don't know when to keep their thoughts to themselves!

    You go and have a great time! Don't think twice about your so-called-friend. You're going to create such good memories with your family. Your kids are going to be talking about this trip for a long time to come. Just enjoy it!

  12. Have a good time! We go every year and stay on property at the Boardwalk. I save all year long for our mid winter vacation and have wonderful memories! And no...we are not rich and spend double the amount of money on diabetic stuff than we do on vacations!

    We consider Facebook here to be the "Wild Wild West of the Internet" Some people just don't read what they write before they hit send. I stay off of Facebook except to monitor my teenage daughter.

  13. New to your blog. Have a great time at Disneyland!


  14. Finally catching up with you....Boy, life has been pretty crazy for you lately. Wow. Transitioning to the pump is...ummm...tough. Right there with you.

    This post got me though. I love it. I love you and I think you are simply fantastic.

    If people only knew what our life was really like. Sometimes I get mad, then I remember that I didn't know before Matthew was diagnosed. But....then I still get mad.

    Mostly because so many people (friends and family members) don't even TRY to understand.